wishing you were here.

i miss the past.

i miss freshman year.

basic courses.

new friends.

different faces. 

i miss the people i used to be close to then.

good morning texts.

late nights.

conversations about nothing. 

i miss how quiet it was.

i stayed in.

asleep when they trailed in. 

woke up to them passed out. 

i miss the simplicity.

nothing crazy.

nothing planned.

nothing to fear. 

i miss my single room.

walls covered with paper.

shoes and clothes scattered on the floor.

the dent in the wall by my bed.

i miss last year. 

with all its shit.

with all the panic.

with all the pain.

i miss the past.

because i think i’ve finally realized

that eventually school ends

and the real world begins. 

and i know i’m not ready for that 

quite yet. 

empty.

so i pack up more and more and more into cardboard boxes that i’ll be sending to my next life. and the more and more a pack away the less and less is left in this room. it finally hit me. im leaving. and soon this will just be an empty room. cold from the lack of living it use to have. how can four walls hold so much more than objects?